Just about everyone has had this experience at one time or another: You have a habit, a behavior, or even a life circumstance that you really want to change, but even though you know it’s completely up to you, you can’t seem to make the shift, no matter how hard you try. It can be extremely frustrating to work so hard at changing oneself and yet never really get where you want to be. If you’re in that boat right now, you won’t want to miss this inspiring new video from #IPEtv. Marc David, founder of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating, will take you through the inner dynamics of personal change and share the best formula ever found for creating the change you’re longing for!
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Below is a transcript of this week’s video:
Greetings friends, this is Marc David, founder of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating.
Today’s Topic: The Secret Formula for Successful Change
So much has been said about this thing called change.
You’ve heard that change is inevitable.
You’ve heard that change is the one constant in the universe.
And you likely know from experience that no matter how things are right now, eventually, whether we like it or not, they will change.
Here’s a fascinating challenge:
There’s a large number of people who are looking to create change in their life when it comes to their eating habits and their unwanted concerns with food – I’m talking about binge eating, overeating, emotional eating, or simply following a diet that we know isn’t good for us and we want to do something different – but we just can’t seem to make that change.
Wouldn’t it be nice if there were a magic formula for change?
Wouldn’t the world be a better place if the process of changing or transforming any unwanted behavior was just a little easier? Well, I think I may have found the best formula yet. I mean that. And if it isn’t the best formula, I think it’s at least in the top three.
But before I tell you what it is, the rule here is, you have to try it out and prove or disprove it for yourself.
So the secret formula for successful change is this:
We need to love ourselves into change and transformation rather than hate ourselves into it.
Did that land for you?
Does that make sense to you?
Here’s what I mean:
So many of us are conditioned and taught that if you want to change an unwanted eating habit, lose weight, deal with your overeating or binge eating – then you clearly have an awful problem that you need to attack. Consider this eating challenge your enemy. Consider yourself a willpower weakling, perhaps you’re a loser, perhaps you really need to be the biggest loser, and whatever the case, there’s clearly something wrong with you because only someone who had something wrong with them would have such a problem.
And such eating problems deserve our contempt, our scorn, self-attack, and a constant barrage of negative internal conversation. Somehow this approach will help us rid ourselves of the problem and change our behavior.
So my question is this: if you’re the kind of person who has indeed followed such a strategy in any way, shape, or form – how is it working for you?
Have you been successful?
Are you happier?
Does this approach make you a better person?
And equally important, if you’ve ever tried to help another person by insisting that there’s something wrong with their character because they have an eating issue – has this approach worked for them?
Here’s my point:
Hating ourselves into true change and transformation is a dead-end street.
All we’re doing is building up a bank account of self-attack and self-rejection.
So what we’re left with is generally a poor self-image and a lack of any kind of sustainable results when it comes to true change or transformation.
The old method of attacking ourselves or demeaning ourselves into change is outdated and no longer useful. It should’ve died with the dinosaurs a long time ago. It elevates no one.
And indeed, such self-hate actually locks in the very unwanted behavior that we’re trying to let go of in the first place. When you fight a habit it tends to fight back. What we resist persists.
Self-love is the greatest alchemical agent. I mean that.
It doesn’t mean that you have to love your unwanted habit and give it all kinds of hugs and kisses – even though that probably wouldn’t hurt.
It means that you focus on loving you – the person who has the unwanted habit – and find ways to cheerlead yourself, inspire yourself, and uplift yourself and to change.
At our core, human beings respond in a fantastically successful way to love.
How could we expect hating ourselves into change to deliver us to the ultimate destination of self-love?
The road that we take will always determine our destination.
If you take a road of self-attack in order to change yourself – you’ll end up at the end of that road all beat up.
If you take a road of self-love to change yourself, you’ll ultimately get where you want to go.
This may be the single most important strategy for transforming any unwanted eating challenge.
It’s the road less traveled.
And it’s actually a very scenic, beautiful, and much easier ride.
If you haven’t gone down this avenue – you totally owe it to yourself to chart a new course.
I hope this was helpful my friends.
The Institute for the Psychology of Eating offers the most innovative and inspiring professional trainings, public programs, conferences, online events and lots more in the exciting fields of Dynamic Eating Psychology and Mind Body Nutrition! In our premier professional offering – the Eating Psychology Coach Certification Training – you can grow a new career and help your clients in a powerful way with food, body and health. You’ll learn cutting-edge skills and have the confidence to work with the most compelling eating challenges of our times: weight, body image, overeating, binge eating, digestion, fatigue, immunity, mood, and much more. If you’re focused on your own eating and health, the Institute offers a great selection of one-of-a-kind opportunities to take a big leap forward in your relationship with food. We’re proud to be international leaders in online and live educational events designed to create the breakthroughs you want most. Our public programs are powerful, results-oriented, and embrace all of who we are as eaters – body, mind, heart, and soul.
Please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org if you have specific questions and we will be sure to get back to you.
Again, that is psychologyofeating.com.
This is Marc David, Founder of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating.
Thanks so much for your time and interest.
To learn more about the breakthrough body of work we teach here at the Institute for the Psychology of Eating, please sign up for our free video training series at ipe.tips. You’ll learn about the cutting-edge principles of Dynamic Eating Psychology and Mind Body Nutrition that have helped millions forever transform their relationship with food, body, and health. Lastly, we want to make sure you’re aware of our two premier offerings. Our Eating Psychology Coach Certification Training is an 8 month distance learning program that you can take from anywhere in the world to launch a new career or to augment an already existing health practice. And Transform Your Relationship with Food is our 8 week online program for anyone looking to take a big leap forward with food and body.