That which you resist, persists.
Imagine you are above your natural, healthy weight. You’re trying to change that for the good, but it’s an ongoing struggle. It persists.
Are you resisting something in that struggle? Getting clear on that could smooth the way to reaching your goal.
- Do you resist your natural genetics?
If we go against what we’re designed to look like, this is generally a guaranteed-to-last struggle. It’s important, however, to recognize that our natural genetics can be mightily altered in an undesirable way by our lifestyle. That is, our weight struggles might reflect too much of some things (highly processed foods, stress) and too little of others (whole foods, physical activity, stress management). Many of us get caught up in these excesses and deficiencies because we’re trying to follow diet rules that just don’t work for us. We end up feeling deprived of what we want to eat and don’t want to exercise because we’re doing it only to burn calories. We’re actually resisting the rules, and overcoming that resistance often involves changing attitudes about food, eating and exercise as a first step.
- Do you resist your appetite?
Appetite is like breathing, a natural part of life. If we always trying to control or curb our appetite, what does that mean? To me, it means we’re caught up in misinformation about how we should be around food, misinformation that generally is about as non-supportive as you can get.
- Is societal opinion at the root of your struggle?
The notion that we should all look a certain way, be a certain size, deserves resistance. But if the statement that resistance = persistence is true, we need to find out a way to make the resistance work for us, not against us. We need to find a way to make it support our well-being. Which brings me to the next point.
- Is it how you feel about yourself and your body?
So many of us are consumed with hate for our current body shape/size, and it colors all our actions. What if we were to stop the hate, accepting ourselves now, as we are? This doesn’t mean we necessarily have to like where we are, or that we wouldn’t benefit from change. What it really means is that we don’t put the barrier of despair in our way. Because non-acceptance, aka body hate, often leads to despair, which often means defeat.
It can help to recognize, too, that accepting ourselves doesn’t mean change can’t happen. Actually, it’s the opposite. It can mean the struggle disappears, and that makes change easier. Once we accept what is, we can move on to exploring what doesn’t work and how best to make it work. We’re not circling around denial of what is but moving on to what can be.
What does acceptance when it comes to weight and body size look like for you?
Marsha Hudnall, MS, RD, CD co-owns Green Mountain at Fox Run, a Vermont retreat for women who struggle with overeating and weight. Founded in 1973, Green Mountain pioneered the non-diet approach and has helped thousands of women establish healthy relationships with food, eating behaviors and their bodies to achieve a healthy weight. Marsha can be reached at email@example.com or (800) 448 8106.
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